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21 November 2002 @ 04:27 pm
Speaking commodity-wise...  
Women are terribly hard to shop for.

And I mean it in the same sense that plutonium is hard to shop for.

The last time someone wanted one, I had to give him myself. That's an act I just can't repeat (that and he knocked down a couple of buildings, it was pretty impressive).

I'm so glad I'm a chick.

Mind you, I'm trying.
 
 
Mood: trying my best
Music: Pixies - No. 13 Baby
 
 
 
just johnjustjohn on November 21st, 2002 01:38 pm (UTC)
And plutonium women? Few and far between!
gimacaroni on November 21st, 2002 02:00 pm (UTC)
Element: woman

Symbol: Wo

Discoverer: Adam

Atomic Weight: accepted as 53 but is known to vary from approx 45 - 130 kilo's.

Occurrence: surplus quantities in all urban areas.

Physical Properties:
1) surface usually covered in painted film
2) boils at nothing, freezes without reason
3) melts if given proper treatment
4) bitter if used incorrectly
5) found in various states, ranging from virgin metal, to common 'ore

Chemical Properties:
1) possess great affinity for gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones
2) able to absorb great quantities of expensive substances
3) may explode spontaneously if left alone with a male
4) insoluable in liquids but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol
5) yields to pressure applied to correct points

Uses:
1) highly ornamental, especially in sports cars
2) most powerful money-reducing agent known
3) can be a great aid to relaxation

Tests:
1) pure specimen turns a rosy tint if discovered in natural state
2) turns green if placed beside a better specimen

Caution:
1) highly dangerous except in experienced hands
2) illegal to posses more than one except in certain areas
chicarun207 on November 21st, 2002 03:46 pm (UTC)
Re: Element: woman
perfect....i needed to smile...
thank you
YES WE CAN HAS!: Aiaaangyl on November 21st, 2002 02:38 pm (UTC)

I'm so glad I'm a chick.
Amen to that!
(Deleted comment)
Torin/Darren WhoEverwolfieboy on November 22nd, 2002 11:00 am (UTC)
Re: shapeshifting
How come I can't shapeshift? No fair.

So completely true. Women get all the niftiest clothes...
Airborne Aaronairborne on November 21st, 2002 05:19 pm (UTC)
Hard to shop for?
I don't think that it's a shopping problem so much as an availability problem. It's like every store is out of stock, and the models they DO have on display are sorely lacking in features.

At least, that's how I feel about it.
gimacaroni on November 21st, 2002 05:36 pm (UTC)
Re: Hard to shop for?
Finding someone special is sometimes like searching for a parking spot. The good ones are taken, and the rest are all handicap.
Mandafee_b on November 21st, 2002 07:56 pm (UTC)
Re: Hard to shop for?
do you have a girlfriend?
gimacaroni on November 21st, 2002 10:50 pm (UTC)
Re: Hard to shop for?
Check out my profile and see.